First we have the bah humbug selection:
Millennium Prayer
Cliff Richard
1999
Ah Cliff, he is just so nice and good and everything that it feels very uncharitable being mean about him. That said he did hit my big brother in the head with a guitar once. I can't remember where or why but he did and sure he said sorry and my brother turned the other lobe but still....
Anyway I understand this was well intentioned and for the kids but really Cliff doing his Cliff stuff in front of green screen scenes of starving children looks smug and self satisfied even if it isn't meant too.
Sorry Cliff.
Driving Home For Christmas
Chris Rea
1988
This song isn't anything more than meh. I guess it is meant to tug at the heart strings and stir up images of Rea battaling through the snow and wind to get home because he will risk his life driving in dangerous conditions because he loves you soooo much.
If he really loved you he wouldn't be reckless and risk death. Wow, through exaggeration I just managed to make the song sound almost interesting. It isn't.
Marys Boy Child
Boney M
1978
It gets stuck in your head and is all warm and happy and tropical and while it might envoke a climate much closer to the one Jesus was born into, we all know the real meaning of Christmas is cold, snow, minimal daylight and getting stuff.
Also, now I know where East 17 got the idea for the first version of the 'Stay Another Day' video...
All I Want For Christmas Is You
Mariah Carey
1994
I might like Mariah Carey if she sang more and warbled her scales (whistle included) less. This is more saccharine sweet than a king sized duvet made of candy floss. Yak yak yak!
All I Want For Christmas Is You (Superfestive)
With Justin Bieber
2011
This is even worse, I don't understand why it exists. Carey is flirting with a child and Bieber is autotuned to death.
I don't even really want to sully the blog with the video... But it is the worst Christmas song.... I am going to have to aren't I? OK well I am not embedding it...
So what would be top 5 worse Christmas tunes? (Please don't let them be ones on my top 5 best ones!)
1 comments:
I don't like Paul McCartney's one very much. Or that reggae nonsense Bieber did on the X Factor the other day.
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